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ARK: SURVIVAL EVOLVED (Honest Game Trailers)

ARK: SURVIVAL EVOLVED (Honest Game Trailers)

The following trailer is rated H for “Honest” From the genre that destroyed the meaning of the term “early access”, comes yet another online open-world survival game, just like all the others except in this one you can eat your own POOP! Oh, and dinossaurs too! That’s pretty cool I guess… ARK: SURVIVAL EVOLVED Discover the primeval world of Ark, a giant unspoiled wilderness park stuck in the Jurassic where you’ll scrape together any resources you can until you master the skills to fight, build, and train dinosaurs and team up with a tribe of fellow players to dominate the island or just knock them out and tie them up in your house then force-feed them, harvest their blood and feces (WTF?) for your garden projects! Wait, what did I just say? WHAT IS THIS PSYCHO NIGHTMARE GAME? Mash together a horrifying monster-man in Ark’s character creator then emerge into the harsh sunlight of the game world where you’ll fight against the survival game clock furiously punching trees with your bare fists scraping together any resources you can to refill those draining meters and desperately trying to build some shelter until a big dinossaur comes along and mauls you to death, sending you right back to square one! (DAMMIT) (Sobbing) I just wanted to be friends! Experience the real draw of Ark: the late game content where you’ll tame and ride massive dinos, build palatial estates and moving dino houses, sport the hottest in dino fashion, uncover futuristic technology, explore the depths of caves and even the sea and summon bosses to fight Terreria style then sight wistfully, close your browser and go back to your actual character (ha ha) who’s crouched naked in the woods somewhere constantly dying and sh*ting himself! (SUCH COMPELLING GAMEPLAY!) Realize your true masochism and join a PvP server where you’ll not only have to content with survival, brutal dinos, and a harsh environment but Internet a**holes as well who will raid your bases, steal your stuff, murder your pets, then kill you and take all of your gear forcing you to start over at the beginning, puching trees ALL OVER AGAIN as they literally steal hours of your life away for their own amusement in the most nightmarish new player experience since Ultima Online! I mean, seriously? There’s no bigger middle finger to a noobie than letting people build traps in the spawn points! ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME HATE THIS GAME? So callus up those knuckles and get ready to fist some dinosaurs or just wait for the VR experience because we ALL know how much better those usually are than normal video games! Starring: and Turok Online You know, I get this game has levels and all, but it’s always a real bummer to get destroyed by a level 80 fish! (It’s a lvl 55 piranha, actually)

100 thoughts on “ARK: SURVIVAL EVOLVED (Honest Game Trailers)”

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    One: Speak up and join the conversation- we encourage respectful debate.

    Two: Respect your community- racism, misogyny, homophobia and hate speech aren’t tolerated.

    Three: Don’t go looking for fights.

    Four: “It's dangerous to go alone!” So play nice.

  2. As someone who has close to 5,000 hours in this game I can honestly tell you any of you were here complaining about how laggy this game is your systems are garbage you're running this game on a potato it's your fault

  3. Have ark since beginning of beta, the concept of it is genius, but the game is so laggy, no support from developers, sending you to care of your problems to a forum where no help comes neither and since December 2018 they don't let you host server on PC for console anymore it keeps giving error messages and join failed, have to rent a nitrado (no way) . They keep adding new maps but don't fix bugs they have at almost 4 years now. IT WAS 1 of my favorite games. Now I don't waste my time on it anymore . It's not worthed and they won't change there politics.

  4. I’m calling bull ####… I’ve never seen this trailer ad to this game till now. This ad is almost spot on except they destroyed their own game and you’ll lag to kingdom come

  5. You dont have to play pvp all survivor games have annoying players in it doing stuff you described. Rust is the same just play on pve

  6. Forgot to mention the entire pvp scene is people hacking under the map, such a waste of time do not play this game if you are looking for survival pvp game.

  7. Ark use to be good around when it came out haha when it was $30 😎 glad I wasn’t one of the people who wasted $60 on a terrible game that non stops lags

  8. Well really, play Pve and have fun, build stuff, never play official servers and you will have fun. Play PvP, rage quit after 5 minutes in official servers, or have fun in unofficial, it's honestly all about the unofficial servers and just having patience, I've spent about 50 hours building my tree house so far, unofficial pve, the only grief I get is microraptor haha they're the worst

  9. Even though I only got the game to play with my friend and just get carried by him I can still say this is 100% accurate

  10. "mash together a horrifying monster man in ark's character creator"

    Never heard something so relatable. Pretty much sums up every character I've made.

  11. Let's be honest (get it?)…
    After a couple hours of roughing it, we looked up and entered a bunch of admen codes to force tame dinosaurs and get materials without doing any work ……

    Right? Or was that just me and my brother?

  12. Punching trees with your fists? Scraping resources together to fill your meters? Scrambling to build shelters? Replace "dinosaur" with "creeper", and I'd almost think you were describing Minecraft.

  13. Ahhh… Ark. the game where if you don’t get on a public server and claim a plot of land within hours of the server opening, you are essentially screwed. (Though you could build a raft and live there instead) tbh, the should remove pillaring. It is annoying and makes it so that the only thing I want to play is single player.

  14. I spent 500 + hours on Ark grinding and each and every time I got raided by some idiots who would just try to make me mad or upset 😂😕😫

  15. What about the random game crashes, getting stuck inside entities, meshing, landing a flyer, harvesting Dino hitboxes, entity pop-in, etc etc. Ark survival evolved: it’s a fully released game.

  16. The AI is ridiculous. Its fight strategy is sprint straight towards player-> attack. Fighting is very unpleasant due to this. You cant dodge, they kill you in 3 hits, all you can do is climb on a rock and shoot them while they stare at you.

  17. I spawned at the southern islets once on a pvp. And there was a base there, with turrets. I got killed immediatally

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