Jack5: Your weapon choices, as a player of Team Fortress 2, are extremely important. Not only are they a means of killing enemies,
but they dictate how you play the game, and how others see you when you play.
It’s not just in official gamemodes where this statement applies.
Believe it or not, Zombie Survival is treated just as seriously as the official gamemodes
by many people, with some pledging their loyalty to the gamemode.
This means that stereotypes, whether inherited or new, have found their way into the minds
of Engineers and Medics alike on these servers. I’m going to go over these in this video for
each weapon, but there are exceptions to these stereotypes that I cannot predict or accurately
observe, so don’t take my word as gospel. We’ll be starting with Medic weapons, but
if you want to see the Engineer’s arsenal, go to the times displayed on the screen right
now. OK, let’s get on with it. You’d think that Medics would use stock over all other melee weapons.
I mean, its the best option, so surely it’s used the most, right?
Well unfortunately that is not the case. Instead, Medics who use stock are, most probably,
veterans of the gamemode. They’ve done the research, and know that the
Bonesaw and its reskins deal the most damage per second, thanks to the unaltered base swing
speed. Therefore, they are the unsung heroes of Zombie
Survival. Either that or they’re completely new, you’ll
be able to tell from their cosmetics. The only reskin that doesn’t follow this formula
is the Frying Pan. Medics who use this either want to earrape
their teammates or they think that the pan has a higher crit rate than the other reskins.
Which is kinda stupid because 1) the pan has the exact same crit rate as the other melees,
and 2) random crits are disabled in Zombie Survival so there’s no point in even trying. Fresh Pink Squid: If you see a Medic using the Übersaw, you know that they’re a part of the majority of
Zombie Survival players. Übersaw Medics can fall into two categories,
neither of which are exclusive. They may just have it equipped because they
use the same weapon in Casual mode. They might also be that kind of Medic that
repeatedly uses the “Saw through your bones” taunt, because they’re either really great
at getting cheap taunt kills, or see other Medics getting taunt kills and are hoping
to have similar success, even though they don’t know where to stand in the first place.
The Übersaw is only useful in situations where Engineers have created a bottleneck
that Medics must pass through, but not a lot else. Jack5: A Medic using the Vita-Saw either doesn’t know what they’re doing or is having a joke
that isn’t inherently funny. Unlike the Übersaw, this weapon sacrifices
some of the user’s health instead of their swing speed, so of course these players are
going to be the weakest of the bunch. If you see a Vita-Saw medic, just give them
a gentle reminder to switch to stock. They’ll… likely listen to you. Peri: Amputator Medics are few and far between, but they’re able to boost their team to victory
in situations where it would pretty much be impossible.
You’ll see them hiding around corners or behind other Medics, playing the violin over and
over to heal their teammates and get some sweet assist kills.
You can trust that these guys take winning seriously, and care for the integrity of their
team. Even if they’ve only temporarily switched
to the Amputator, these Medics can be great supporters or leaders, and their existence
alone is a determining factor of a match’s outcome.
Treat these people with respect, as you never know when their healing power will come in
handy. Jack5: Switching to stock can be a hard transition
to make, especially since the Bonesaw looks as bland as every other default item.
The Solemn Vow is a trap that Medics fall into when trying to switch to stock, with
slightly better swing speed than the Übersaw and the ability to see Engineer health.
These Medics become affixed to the enemy health display, using it and it alone to judge their
performance, rather than counting successful hits to track damage or following Engineers
by using their actual eyes. If you meet one of the few Solemn Vow Medics
that listen to player advice, tell them to quit using the weapon, just like you would
tell someone to quit smoking, and hopefully you can cure another Medic of this unfortunate
illness. Well, five weapons in and the Medic portion
of this video is already done. If you know what the gamemode is you’ll know
that I can’t talk about their primaries or secondaries because Zombie Survival strips
Medics down to melee. However, the Engineer’s weapons deserve a
lot more attention, for there are no restrictions on their weapon choices, and the playstyle
Engineers choose can vary far greater than a Medic’s can.
Let’s just hope that you, and any other Engineers that you meet, pick a reasonable playstyle.
I don’t want to have to continue spreading this information by my own word of mouth constantly.
OK, primaries! By default I should be talking about stock
first and then move on to the other weapons, but the Widowmaker is our starting primary
as it’s undeniably the best choice. Again, this weapon has a learning curve due
to its use of metal for ammo. Most Widowmaker Engineers can be found camped
in proper defense spots, helping each-other out by upgrading buildings and sharing kills.
This strategy is often the key to surviving, so long as the defense spot chosen is of good
quality. However, because the Widowmaker is the most-used
weapon, not too much can be found in the way of stereotypes for it, and some Engineers
completely defy these ideals by pretending they actually have… …the stock shotgun. Engineers with the stock primary tend to be
far more aggressive than Widowmaker users. They love to get as painfully close to the
Medics as possible and relentlessly pummel them with their larger pool of ammo, and get
killed in the process. It usually ends up being, put simply, annoying as all hell.
But don’t judge Shotgun users on their gun alone, for they might not follow this playstyle
at all. Just like with the Widowmaker, some Shotgun
Engineers are reserved and stick with the team, and are only using stock because they
cannot cope with the sight of having a smaller ammo count, which is very close-minded of
them since the Widowmaker draws ammo from dispensers and doesn’t need to reload when
it does. Come on guys, just learn to use the Widowmaker,
it can’t hurt. Fresh Pink Squid: The Frontier Justice is awful and has no redeeming qualities. It is a straight downgrade from the Shotgun
and that’s it. Engineers that equip this weapon have forgotten
to switch their primary after playing on Casual mode, and despite them telling you that the
weapon might be good in the Sentries Allowed bonus round, sentries can’t be given ammo
to shoot with, so they’ll never get any revenge crits.
It’s also very likely that they’ve never even played the bonus round either, hence their
opinion. Just give them a subtle nudge to switch to
one of the first two options, unless they’re one of those Strange or Australium Frontier
Justice mains, in which case, you should just not attempt to convince them ever. Muffin Man: The Pomson 6000 is awful and has no redeeming qualities. Engineers that use the Pomson 6000, unlike the Frontier Justice, are solely using it
in order to joke around. They know its a horrible weapon, are are probably
getting a kick out of other people’s reactions to them using it.
In all honesty, try to ignore their weapon choice and let their joke run its course. Jack5: The Rescue Ranger is awful and has no redeeming qualities. Are you starting to see a pattern here? It’s a weapon designed for building support
alone, and therefore is incredibly difficult to use on Zombie Survival when buildings can
only heal, and actually shooting enemies is a key part of the game.
Its ability to heal buildings is also lackluster compared to the swing speed and damage output
of the Medic. Once again, Rescue Ranger Engineers have forgotten
to switch primary after playing on Casual mode, and should be pointed to a better weapon
choice. Peri: These Engineers are relics of the past.
They used the Panic Attack before Jungle Inferno dropped, and they constantly hope that the
weapon will be restored back to how it was beforehand, because it sucks now.
Little do they know that using it only worsens the problem.
Do you really think that Valve can hear you whining while you’re holding the weapon in
your grubby, Texan hands? All they can infer from that situation is that you’re one of the people that use the weapon, and by their logic, like the new changes.
Just drop it altogether! Rebel against our creators, I’m sure they’ll
eventually pick up on their mistake! I’m sure, honestly, I’m… whatever, I’ll leave Jack to the Engineer’s secondaries. Jack5: Pretty much everyone uses these, and I mean, why wouldn’t you?
It’s the only Engineer secondary with a reliable damage output that rewards skill.
So um… I guess these Engineers… know not to be different?
I dunno, you can’t make any sense of a person just from their Pistol or Lugermorph.
That’s like trying to write a detailed biography about someone’s full life when you only have
a picture of their hairstyle. Completely preposterous. Engineer: Agh, goodnight Irene! Aahhh! Medic: [long, evil laughter] Engineer: Damnit, damnit, damnit, damnit! I need some doggone help! [frustrated sigh] Medic: Come over here! I promise I will heal you! [short laugh] Engineer: Help! Help me! Aw hell. Dag-nabbit damnit nabbit daggit! Medic: Prepare for your examination! [long, evil laugh] Engineer: [scream] Dom: When you see Engineers holding the Wrangler, sitting in their lonely corner in fear as
they watch as the Medics surround them gradually, you just have to think to yourself… why?
Why do they do this? I’ll be square with you, don’t ever use
this. Just like the Frontier Justice, the Wrangler
and its reskins suffer, because the gamemode doesn’t have functioning sentries, so these
people are stuck with the absolute worst secondary to exist and be available for use in Zombie
Survival. It does nothing! [short, mad laughter]
It does nothing at all! Jack5: These Engineers have a knack for going out
of their way to make you miserable. They love to plop themselves on top of their
dispenser, or even beside it, and hold down that fire button like there’s no tomorrow.
You could say the Short Circuit is the Widowmaker if it was a secondary, but it is so much more
degrading than you may initially think, and there’s no way for me to accurately describe
how annoying these Engineers are to you unless you see them for yourself.
The weapon’s second fire is the worst part, as the Engineer does not even need to aim
while he zaps multiple people in a row through his dispenser, holy hell!
If you’re sure the server they’re on has no restrictions on the Short Circuit’s second
fire, these people deserve to be banned, so find the right time to strike.
Speaking of striking… It should be obvious to everybody that the
Gunslinger is the most powerful and widespread melee weapon, and for good reason.
It boosts your health from 125 to 150 and gives you situational crits (which, mind you,
are different from random crits, which are disabled), and the downside of the mini-sentry’s
size is negated because most of the time you don’t even get the chance to place a sentry!
Gunslinger Engineers form the majority, and can range in skill greatly, from top-level
to pure idlers, but at least these guys have their priorities set in motion. Dom: Unlike other stock items, the Engineer’s default wrench and its reskins pale in comparison
to other melees available. It has no upsides, so what’s the point in
using it? Stock Engineers just don’t know the meta,
or they’re free-to-play, and they’ll either learn how to circumvent this on their own,
or you can help them speed things up if you’re willing to gamble your reputation. Muffin Man: The Southern Hospitality is the middle [sic] out of all of the Engineer’s melees.
It’s not the absolute best weapon available, yet its not mediocre enough to be considered
a lost cause. Southern Engineers are not top-level players,
but do have an established range outside of the god-tier.
Even so, times are changing, and the world would be a better place if they learned to
switch to the Gunslinger, just while they play this specific gamemode. Jack5: The Jag is awful and has no rede- yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you get it. A lot of weapons become
useless when shoved into the world of Zombie Survival.
This weapon gets used by Engineers that believe the faster construction time and hit rate
will allow them to get an advantage in fortifying bases, when in reality they have plenty of
time and using it requires them to hit their enemies more times in a row for no good reason…
look, just don’t use this, okay? It’ll benefit both you and everyone around
you if you stick to the weapons that fit the meta. [annoyed sigh] Eureka Effect, Eureka Effect. This melee has a pretty broad stereotype,
but it is far from what any of us would like to hear about.
Since the entire point of the weapon is to build teleporters fast and also teleport back
to spawn, the Eureka Effect attracts clueless free-to-plays, cowardly Engineers who would
rather leave their team to die in order to save their own lives, and… [annoyed sigh] …trolls.
Yes, Eureka Effect Engineers are commonly trolls. By building teleporters in extremely awkward places and destroying them once a teleport
happens, they’ve found the easiest way possible of killing their own team members for their
amusement, and they like to brush it off by pretending [derpy voice] “it was just an escape teleport”!
[normal voice] Like Short Circuit Engineers, the worst of these guys should be banned, but make sure
you know absolutely everything about them before making your accusation.
They might turn against you. And that’s it!
All possible Medic and Engineer weapons covered and analysed.
I hope I didn’t bore you with both my mumblings and those of my actors.
If not, I’m glad to hear that! Why don’t you smack that red button so hard
it falls off its hinges? Helps me out, helps you out, win win
in my books. Other than that, I want to thank everybody
who helped me with this project, it’s been a pleasure working with you all, and I
can very much say the same about you there, who have come this far into this documentary
about a custom Team Fortress 2 gamemode of all things.
And until next time…! Uhhh, something. [quiet] This is the second time that that tagline
has failed me. Why am I still using it?
I don’t get it!