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THE BOSSES WILL SURVIVE | Sheltered


*WAPOSH!* Top of the mornin’ to ya laddies! My name is JackSepticEye and welcome to SHELTERED. A lot of you will know what this game is because it’s been around for a long time and I’ve been meaning to play it for a really long time as well, ever since- because- This is a game that’s very much like “This War of Mine,” and back when I played “This War of Mine,” everyone was saying that I should play “Sheltered.” And it- it was on the back burner for so long, so I’m finally getting around to it, because it’s always looked like a really cool game. I’ve never played it before, even in my spare time. I’ve seen screenshots of it and I’ve seen little snippets of it here and there, so I don’t know what the overall mechanics are like, if it’s gonna be like “This War of Mine,” But if you like that game, you’ll probably really like this one. The art style of this game is pretty neat as well, like the little pixelated graphics. So… It LOOKS like a cool game, and a lot of people have some very nice stuff to say about it, so I wanted to give it a try. “Customize family.” “In Sheltered you look after a family of 2 adults and 2 children. Before you begin you can customize how each individual looks.” Ohh, now this I like! So I can make them my own, my own little family! “Traits and stats govern how the characters act. For example, a character with high strength is especially powerful in melee combat.” Ah ok! ‘Cause that was one of the things lacking in “This War of Mine,” it- it was kind of a- a pre-done thing, that when you got in, the characters that you were getting, they had their own traits, but you didn’t get to decide what they were. Ohh-Kay.
(skip to 7:30 for the game if you want) How many- how many people do we have? Um, your name’s not gonna be Carl, by the way, your name’s gonna be Bobby. Attaboy. Uh, “Top Color,” I don’t faukin’ know. Bobby, you’re gonna have a white shirt and black pants. That actually looks pretty good! I like this. “Body type.” That’s not body type, that’s clothes. Ahm, can I go back to what I had? oOOOoooo! Oo I could make them all scavengery! Um… I like THIS. I like- I like how he looks. Can I… randomize? Oh “Randomize!” Let’s do a few randomizations- actually… uh… no, no, no- Ooo that last one looked cool! She looked like a badass ninja! Ok, This isn’t too bad actually. Ahm, how do I increase your… your thingies? Didn’t it say I got to-? Oh, “Stats Preset” Ooo! “Well Educated,” “Athletic,” “Troubled.” Ok, NOT FUCKIN’ “RONALD!” “Bobby!” *laughs* Bobby’s gonna be our, uh… He’s gonna be our- our like, tough guy. He’s gonna get out, he’s gonna punch people in the face.
(LIKE A BOSS!) “Violent,” “Strength,” uh, “Intellige-” yeah, ok, next… “Customize Parent 2.” This is a nice outfit. This is a nice outfit, Betty! I really like it. Do you see the names I’m goin’ for? Do you- do you get it now? Ok, good. *laughs* Uh, ok, I’ll- uh- I’m gonna have to randomize. Ah I probably shoulda kept it the way it was ’cause she looked COOL! a- Aw this is cute! “Carl”! No, what is this? Fuckin’ “Walking Dead?” No! You are “Betty.” And you are going to be our… “Street Smart?” “Intelligence,” “Perception…” “Logical,” “Well-Rounded,” “Violent,” “Good Upbringing,” Ok! You’re gonna be well-educated! Betty and Bobby are gonna be 2 sides of the same coin! Bobby’s gonna be the BRAWN, and she’s gonna be the BRAIN! And they’re gonna stick in together, and It’s gonna be great. She’s “Hygienic” as well. OHhhhhhhhhhhhh You are “Resourceful.” “Hygienic,” “Small Eater,” “Courageous,” Courageous! Ok, cool. Uh, you are going to be… “Proactive,” “Optimistic,” “Resourceful!” I want my well-educated person to be resourceful! I have no idea how important any of these traits are or anything. Uh… You- er- no, I’m gonna have to randomize first. I like how they call him “Steven,” hahahaha! SSSTEVE!!! ummm… I need a little Billy! A little- I need a little Billy bitch! Uh, haha! *old west accent* Eee doggy, you lookin’ good! THERE we go! Clothes- the top color is good, bottom color… No! Top color should be green! Here- ‘Cmon- Green. Green me up, bro! Ok, that’s- that’s green. And bottom needs to be orange. We don’t even have an orange. Ok, whatever. “Debra?!” No! There we go, ahm… *small frustrated sigh* Wait, the oth- the je- When you change the gender, it chang- oh, go back. Fuck! When you change the gender, it just changes the randomization of them. That’s really weird! Ok, fuck this, you’re just gonna be called “Billy.” Ahhm… Wha- What traits are you gonna have? “Hyper?” What is tha- “Dexterity.” Ok. So I have 1, 2, 3, 4, 5; 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
(I’ve got the same combination on my luggage!) So shouldn’t I make it so that they all are good at 1 thing? Or is it good to have well-rounded characters? Ahm… You’re a “Bully,” “Alert,” “Smarty Pants.”
A “Know-It-All!” No, “Rough and Tumble,” “Well Spoken,” “Brain Box.” I’ma make you “Hyper,” little Billy! You little shitbag. And then we’re gonna have a little… a little Suzy. There we go, uh, “Top Color.” What are we gonna give ya, Suzy? What’s gonna look nice? What’s really going to make your style POP? Uhm, I was kinda like- I’m kinda diggin’ the orange, Sooz! Not gonna lie! Uh, “Hair Color.” Umm… Can we make you a little blondie? Maybe? I dunno. “Skin Color.” We’ll make you white as milk. *chuckles* Uhm… Di- I- I don’t know, I just pickin’- “Traits,” “Deep Sleeper,” Proac- Oh wait, what was… ? “Proactive.” Ok, that’s good. If you’re hyper and proactive, that’s good. You’re gonna be our optimistic person. And you are going to be… “Well Spoken?” Sure, why not? Awh, I don’t get a last family member! Ehg- I get a pet! Oh, baha- yeah, let’s get a fuckin’ fish! In the apocalypse! “This trusty gold fish provides an escape into the underwater world of peace and tranquility. It provides a large stress reduction. Ohh, that would actually be pretty good. Y’can get a snake… Think I’m gonna go with a dog. “Pet’s Name: Billy!” *laughs* Did I not just pick it at random? Umm… Oh, what are we gonna call our dog? It’s- *clicks tongue* Do I wanna call it like Rex or Rover or something fuckin’ generic? Ahmmmm… *singing* What’s a good name for a dog? “Doodle.” ‘Cause I always said that that would be the name I’d call my dog if I ever got one. Umm… NO! No! no! “Sam!” It’s “I Am Legend” all over again. HaHA!
(So the dog dies? Oh, spoiler…) Uh, right! So, what’s our family gonna be called? We could be “The Bosses,” But I- Do I really wanna go like that again? The- w- If you don’t know, by the way, I was picking names from the- the kids- or- not the kids, the family in… SIMS 4, Suzy is a new addition. I had… Bobby, Betty, Billy… who’s the daughter’s name? Bitty! I had Bitty and Betty. It wasn’t very clever of me. Ahm… Uhhmm… urgh..ahm… ya. “The Boss Family!” Why the fuck not? “Do you want to play the tutorial?” Yes I do, ’cause I have no idea how to play it. And we’re like… *laughs* Fuckin’ 8 minutes into this episode, so! We need to actually get in and starta playin’!
But I like when games let you customize everything. Then you can just make it your own, and it feels more unique and- *stops a burp* You can make up the own- your own characters as you go along. What are y’doon-? get in! Kinda like “60 Seconds” as well. “Bobby-” Bobby’s feelin’ ok. How’s the rest of my family feelin’? Shoulda called you guys “The Joneses” Kinda look like an Indiana Jones kind of family. “Look around the shelter by moving the mouse.” Ok, yeah, I got it. “Zoom in and out with Left Control.” oOoo! Ok. How d- How do I- How do I skip you? H- How d- How do I move you along? Ah, ok. “Restore- Add fuel to the generator to restore power.” “Highlight the object and right mouse to interact with it.” “Add fuel!” Where do I- Where do I have fuel? Where did I just see that I had that? This?! Oh, I have 7 fuels. Is that what you’re tellin’ me? “Commands will be performed by the currently selected family member shown at the top left.” “The generator must be kept running to power vital life support systems.” Ok, so how do I- How do I change? “Spread work across the family to avoid tiring.” “Highlight a family member and press the left mouse button to select them.” It said I could also press Q for somethin’. I dunno what that said! “Regularly fix items to prevent them breaking.” “Fix the generator to keep it from breaking.” Ok… “FIX!” Go Betty! Fix it up! You’re our resourceful one, after all. I think. I kinda forget what- what traits you have. *slurred* “This icon will appear over any items that are in need of repair.” Ok, cool. Can I MOVE my characters around? Like, select 1, and then do something with them? …mayyyybe…? Is that what I just did? Okay. “It’s even MORE important to look after the family. Remember, highlight a family member, and press left mouse to select them.” “You can also use Q and E to cycle through all your family members.” Aahhh, ok. That’s what I was doin’. “Drink water from the water butt.” *laughs*
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Is that what that’s called? A water butt? *laughs* Here, drink some water from my ass! *laughs* I love it! Ok, “Your goal is to survive for as long as possible. You can Explore, Expand, Maintain.” Yeah, of course. “Explore and gather resources by using the Radio Transmitter to set up an expedition.” “Expand the shelter and build new items with the workbench.” So it’s VERY much like “This War of Mine.” Do I have to send people out at nighttime? Is that- Is that the only tutorial I’m gonna get? Really? “View!” “Day 1: We made it! We only have each other now.” “To whoemmer- whoever reads this in the future, this is our headcount: Bobby, Betty, Billy Suzy and our pet dog, Sam!” “I can’t believe we found this place. It’s a bit rough around the edges, but it will provide good protection from the elements.” *softly* “Hopefully no one finds us down here. We just want some peace.” We sure do! Wait, I have Quests as well.
“There are currently no active quests.” Ok, got it, so… What do I do? “Thirst,” “Hunger,” I’m gonna hafta find out the systems as well. Your thirst is on yellow, but I have to find out… what the- like the balance is. “Take suit.” What is it? “View.” “Set up Expedition,” “Upgrade,” “Broadcast,”
“Scan Frequencies.” Ok. THERE’S A BUNNY UP TOP!
(Fluffy bun-bun!) CAN WE GET HIM? Ok, “Upgrade.” “You can increase your shelter’s efficiency by upgrading your Oxygen filter, Generator, and Water Filter.” “The shelter’s doors can also be upgraded to help against shelter breaches.” Oh god, it’s like “Fallout.” “Fallout Shelter,” I mean. Um… So I need wiring, circuit boards, and circuit breakers. Ok, I’ma hafta set up an expedition. “Assemble your party!” It’s like an RPG! “Going on expeditions allows your shelter members to search the wasteland for items and resources and recruit OTHER wasteland survivors to your shelter.” *gasp* I can increase my family! Do you wanna be in my family? “You can have as many concurrent expeditions as you like, but the party size is a maximum of 2.” Ohkay, so how do I…? “Select your expedition party members.” He’s 100 out of 100, and he’s feeling “dai-jo-bou” And he’s doin’ nothin’. And he’s coureagous and hands-off so… oOoo! So I can pick “Nobody” or an actual character. Ok, I’m gonna leave these at home. Bobby’s gonna go out on his own. Uhh, “Map!” “Plan your route. You can plot EXACTLY where your party will travel by adding waypoints on the map! “Expeditions cost water, the longer the expedition, the more water is required.” ooOooooo… Ok, what does the flag mean? Let’s do this. The flag means something. “Hold and drag right mouse to arrow over keys on the map.” Ohhkay. And then… “Right mouse to delete your waypoint, add waypoint.” I don’t know what the flag means. Ah, there’s a flag on everything, it’s just where we’re goin’. I thought there wasn’t a flag on the church one. “Pet: No.”
*changes to “yes”* I’ma bring my dog with me. And we’re just gonna go as far as the church. “Choose your equipment: Preparation is key to a successful expedition.” “You may wan-” Ok, “Remember to equip gas masks to each member, otherwise they may become quite ill out in the wasteland.. It’s “60 Seconds” meets “This War of Mine!” Ok, “Equip!” Ahhm, we don’t need- do we need wood? *clears throat* Do we have any weapons, by the way? Can I have a rubber? *giggles*
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) That like a little eraser? “Spring,” “Duct tape,” “Wool.” What do I need? “[Pipe:] A hollow thin- Strength.” Ok, I’ma equip this. Aaand… mmaybe some duct tape? Some nylon, anti-radiation tablets *clears throat* Sorry, I ate right before this, so my neck is full of
*ECH* *UGH* I don’t like it. “[Valve:] A device used to control the flow of gases or liquids. Used in system upgrades.” Ok. “[Anti-Radiation Tablets:] Medication effective in relieving and preventing symptoms of radiation poisoning.” “[Duct tape:] NECTAR OF THE GODS!” Ok, I’ma- I’ma put these back, because then I’ll still have them… afterwards, because if he gets infected while he’s out, I can use the pills then when he gets back. Umm….. I don’t know if I need a whole lot. “[Duct Tape:] Nectar of the gods. Used in crafting.” Heh! I like how you call it “Nectar of the gods.” Because that’s what it fuckin’ was when I played something like “The Escapists.” Do I have anything else? Oh god, I have a lot of shit! I’ma bring 1 water with me, and 1 food. Oh yeah, I’ma bring 2 waters with me, ’cause they said expeditions cost water. Good idea. Ok, “Are you ready to send this party out into the wasteland?” YES! I probably picked TERRIBLE things, but we’ll see what this does. I don’t know enough of the game yet teh- to figure out if I did good or bad so… We’re just gonna hafta check. GO SPARKY! Sam, I mean. Shoulda called him Sparky. Fuck! You guys headin’ out? …bye… They’re gone forever. My- my family’s fucked now. What do I do? Why is green-? Green is like the thirst is lower, yellow means it’s higher. “Do you copy? Someone is trying to get in touch through the radio transmitter.” “An icon is showing above the transmitter.” Ohhh, kay, yes. Accept transmission. “Searching locations is the best way to acquire items and resources.” “These will differ in variety and amounts depending on the type of locations searched.” “You may also encounter other wasteland survivors.” ohhKAY! “Hello, this is Bobby. I’ve found a church out in the wasteland. Should I check it out?” “Search the location.” That’s why I sent you! So I picked up a transmission from Bobby who was out there? God damn it Bobby. Ok, let’s see what everything else does. “Open Clipboard.” “Generat-” Ohhhhh! *snaps* Very very good! This is helpful. 97, 97, 66, we’re good, we’re fine, *singing Lego Movie* Everything is awesome. Everything is cool when you’re part of a team. Everything is awesome! Yeah, so green is lower than the yellows? Well, I mean, s- slightly higher green. That’s kind of annoying. Oh! What’s going on? What did you find? “Bobby to base! I found something at this church. Are you interested?” Um, you didn’t- *imitates radio* *static* You didn’t say over, over. Ah, “Bobby to base! I have found something at this church. Are you interested? Over!” There we go! Better! “Examine items.” “You can transfer items that you find-” Oh-kay! So what did you find? 3 pipes, a spring, a battery, a bucket, MANNEQUIN ARM?! You can’t transfer that item because there is no room for it. *under his breath* Fack! “Paint can”
*under his breath* Shit! Ok, while a paint can and a fuckin’ mannequin arm- “Could be useful once recycled.” Can I- ? *frustrated sigh* Can I right click, and like get rid of shit? Ok, these are all more useful, ok. Confirm that! Are you done transferring items? YES WE ARE! Bobby! You wanna come back to us? *sings* Bobby come back! You can blame it all on me. oou, we can upgrade! What do we need for this? 7 hinges & 7 rope?! God damn it. Well what can we craft? Ahmmm, right! We can craft a ladder,
“Used to warp- move between levels.” *meme* dats pretty neat! Uh, “Small Water Butt: The small water butt is capable of storing 20 units of water.” Man, you can store so much water in that butt! Heh! “Shelter room: A large concrete room used in expansion of the shelter.” So I can make a new room. Is this how I expand my shelter… bigger? “Tiny pantry.” I have one of those. “Makeshift shower: A basic shower made from the bare minimum of resources. This shower uses a lot of water, reduces dirtiness.” Well, I have a lot of dirtiness, after all. Oh god! There’s like, THERE’S 4 TIERS OF SHIT?! And a special? I might think that this game is gonna be something that goes WAY over my head very fast. A tripwire! That might be useful. Does it like alert me that guys are coming in? “[Trip wire:] Trip wires are used to arm traps inside the shelter. Traps can only be armed whilst raiders are trying to break in.” Ok, “Provides 2 extra inventory slots when equipped.” Yes! I wanna make one of these. “You’ve just assigned your shelter member a job. Jobs appear next to the selected member’s portrait, and you can have a maximum of 2 jobs.” Ok, so these things over here. Sick! Uh, Billy! What are you goin’ doin’? What is this? “Open storage.” What do we have? We got a whole pile of shit! I don’t actually need to look at that. Right, so, for now, there’s not a whole lot to do… which is great. Oh, HazMat suits, I shoulda take- Ahh, should I have put one of them on Bobby before sendin’ him out? Oh! Sam’s back! WHERE’S MY- oh, here he is, oh thank god. Are you ok? What IS this? Oh, that’s my oxygen filter, ok, cool. What did you find Bobby? Well, I know what you found, actually, already. No need to tell me, it’s fine. “If you want to speed up time, you can press the shift button to fa- er… or the Fast Forward button.” oOoo! He got p- up perception. “Transfer your items that you are carrying on the left to your shelter storage on the right.” Take all! *victoriously* Ha ha! Awesome! Ok. Gettin’ the hang of it. Umm… But we’re not really… doing a whole lot.
Let’s scan some frequencies. Ah, why am I making Billy do it? God-dammit. Suzy, what are you goin’ doin’? Y’gonna pet the dog? You can’t pet the dog. You- Yer useless to me Suzy! Um, Bobby, how are ya feelin’? He’s feelin’ ok! I mean, not great, not too ba- things could be better, Bobby, I agree. Uh, “Rearrange shelter.”
Aww, Sam goes up and down, that’s adorable! Uh… Ok, we can’t upgrade, should I set out in another expedition? “Take Suit.” “Yes.” “Set up expedition.” Why not? Ok. He’s feeling ok, doing nothing, he’s courageous and hands-off. Right, ahm… Should I send somebody else out with him this time? Should I send Suzy out with him? Should I- ? Oh, I can’t. “Select your expedition party members.” Yeah, when I go back to him, it lets me pick, but… Ok, let’s go to the school this time. And then, go to the small house. Do both! A small pipe, “Equip,” uh, equip the bag. Do I need a gas mask if I have a HazMat suit on? I’m equipping it just in case, I probably do need it. “One use only.” O-kay. ‘Cause I just wanna make sure my guys survive! Aaaand, we are going to need some… woe-tay, and some food. And an empty petrol can! Because, if he has an empty petrol can, if he finds fuel, then we’re good. “Send party.” “Are you sure you want to send this party into the wasteland?” Hells to the yizzity yes! Oh, he takes it off anyway. Ok, so what are the HazMat suits for? *snooty* Most curious! “A shelter member is tired and needs to sleep. Tiredness prezvnthm-” “You can craft an object at the workbench to satisfy this need.” OHh- wait, who’s tired? We’re at least fixing this. Where’s the tiredness one? Ok, “Disease.” “Tiredness,” Ohh, are you increasing?! Ok, Billy’s tired so, Betty, we need you to craft an item. Can I make a bed? Where do I make beds? Oo, a bed. “The single bed offers-” “Workbench Level 2 required.” FUCK! I don’t HAVE anything! Ok, ah… “scan for-” no! “Incoming radio transmission!” Pick it up! “Hello! This is Bobby! I’ve found a school out in the wasteland. Should I check it out?” Bobby! Again! You have to say OVER, over! “Search location.” Umm… *surprised Jackaboy* OH I DIDN’T BRING THE DOG WITH ME! THAT WAS STUPID! Ok, how do I make you stop? Ok, here. Stop doin’ that. Ok, so these bars go UP. That makes way more sense now, why they’re yellow and green. Now I get it, ok. So ah, can we not sleep anywhere ’cause I have no beds? “Transmission.” “Gettin’ Thursty!”
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Ok, I get it. “Bobby to base! I’ve stumbled across somebody in this school. Do you want me to try and talk to them?” “Approach strangers.” *deep rumbling tones*
“School.” School IS terrifying. Heh. Ah, it’s only Mildred. *laughs* I found someone called Betty! *laughs* Betty, is that you? How did you get out here as well? Uh, “Hey! Hey you!” Uhh, “Bully,” “Flee,” “TRADE!” “We’ve got some supplies if you want to trade.” “If you’re out here lookin’ to trade, you’ve got nothin’ I need.” *Music sounds like a SNES cartridge was dislodged, but ascends peacefully into silence* Wha happen? I dunno what happen. “Accept Transmission.” “Bobby to base, I found something at the school, are you interested?” YAS! Um… Ooo! Ok, what else did you find? A chisel. Hinges! I need these! Uh, A nail… What did I need again? A circuit breaker! Ok, I can only get 3 more things. *under his breath* Shit! “Empty petrol can.” Nails’d be handy, food, limestone. OK! These stack! Ok, awesome. Is a chisel really good? Magnesium. “[Screwdriver:] Used in crafting-” Yeah, a lot of these probably are. “[Plastic:] A manmade plas- er, A manmade substance that litters most homes, used in crafting.” A lens, see, a lot of these things are probably like, super helpful! Ok, a screwdriver will be helpful. Is a chisel helpful? These’ll stack, so I can get these. Uh, “[Log:][…]bark looks sign- singed! Could be recycled into small amount of wood.” Ahmmmmm… *Popeye* Uh oh. Wool… *groan* I hafta figure out what’s the most important! Limestone, prolly not, ’cause I haven’t seen anything that needs that crafting. Nails, yeah. I think nails’ll be very helpful, and, more wood? I need more inventory slots! *repeating error noise as he clicks lock* “Confirm, Confirm.” Bobby, yer gonna hafta come back to us! Billy Boss! He’s tired. How do I make him sleep? Can I make him sleep if I have nothing for him to sleep on? shiit Uh, ok, Suzy! Accept the transmission! I- ft- “Hello, this is Bobb- founna small house in the wasteland. Should I check it out?” “Search Location,” Maybe we’ll find some people, but I can’t get any more ITEMS BOBBY! Um, Betty, “Craft item,” “Upgrade,” “Rearrange shelter.” “When Nature Calls: Looks like somebody needs the toilet! Family members don’t relieve themselves when-” “Poor shelter hygiene may lead to unwanted visitors such as rats, so it’s important that the needs are met.” “You can craft an object at the workbench to satisfy this need.” how? how? How ca-! I can’t craft ANY of this shit! I can’t craft beds! Or toilets or anything ’cause they’re Tier 2! And I can’t upgrade my thing, to fuckin’ Tier 2 because- Ohhhhh nnnnnoooooo! Wait, that’s a level thr- OH THAT’S LEVEL 2! I COULD’VE INCREASED IT TO LEVEL 2! I though tha- I thought the, the solid one was the one that I already had! Oh, “Incoming Transmission.” “Bobby to base,” Ok, strangers. *low rumble again* *reads in deep voice* “Small house” *laughs* It makes it seem like a fuckin’ horror game! Hie! “Hey you! Wait a second!” “Recruit!” “Ah, you wanna team up for a while? Might be safer.” “Damn! Ask me, there’s a sweet F A worth fighting for. You think there’s still a chance don’t you?” “New recruits enter the shelter automated. They can be given jobs, but automation cannot be switched off and they cannot be sent out on expeditions until their loyalty is high enough.” Ok, “Automation can be deactivated after 3 days, recruits can be sent out on expeditions after 5 days, and they’ll be fully loyal after 7 days. Ok, so, after 7 days, they’ll just be another controllable character completely. “Recruit!” “You look like you will be really useful. Here’s the location of our shelter, meet us there.” “Oh, maybe the world isn’t as bad a place as I thought. Thanks stranger, you won’t regret letting me in your group.” WILL I THOUGH?! *nervously* She seems scary! Ahm, Suzy, “Accept Transmission!” Ahh… ok, “Examine Items” ’cause I want to see what you’ve found. A book… metal, glass jar, ok. “Confirm.” ‘Cause when I was upgrading the thing… I thought that this was like Level 1. I was like “Ok, there’s Level 2, I can’t upgrade to it yet,” but THIS was Level 2. Ok, I get it. Just explaining myself. There’s gonna be lotsa people in the comments being like “Jack! Ya don’t GET IT!” It’s like “Of course not! It’s my first time ever playing this!” Hi, Brenda! Uhh, Suzy! You’re gonna hafta go and talk to Brenda, ok? *aside* Is Brenda good? I hope Brenda’s nice. She looks nice, those shorts and that scraggly hair. *nervously* Hi. Oh Bobby’s back! Sup Bobbert? “Automated shelter members will take care of their own hunger, thirst, toilet, tiredness and hygiene needs. Press H or Home to switch automation on and off. Ok, so I- I can’t do that yet anyway, right? Ahm… “Perception.” Ok, cool! “Take all,” “Yes!” “Yes.” Uh, Billy needs some water right? Ok. Go drink from the water butt. Heh! Oh NoNoNoNoNo! No No No No No No! It’s not Billy! It’s Suzy! SHE’S red on thirst. Ok, you’re almost done with this. YES! Uh, Bobby, you can craft items. Tier 2, let’s craft some beds. “[Bed:] Single bed offers moderate-” Ok. I’m gonna put one bed here… Fantastic. Now, Betty… You craft items, another room. Nice! Nice dude, sick! Um, that’s gonna go… HERE. swEEEEet! This is good! So I can go on Brenda, “Dismiss.” No I don’t wanna dismiss Brenda. I’m pressing H to turn on and off her automation though. Oh I can’t do it until after 3 days, right? oHkay! Everyone’s doin’ alright, not fuckin’ great- Ok, Day 2. *gruff narrator voice throughout* “There’s some strange people walking around these wastelands.” “We had better be careful when we’re out and about.” “We’re not sure if that person we met was a doctor,” “But they sure knew their onions.”
(*Shrek appears*)
( *All Star by Smash Mouth plays*) *normal* what?
(Some-) Heh! Do doctors know their onions, or something?
(-body once told me the world is gonna roll me) “Apparently we can prevent radiation sickness by taking the tablets in advance. That’s good to know.” Yeah ok. oo! a camper van. “Check vehicle. A Sturdy Set of Wheels.” “The RV offers a huge storage capacity for wasteland expeditions and requires less water than travelling by foot. The RV uses petrol-” “Once you have found ALL THE PARTS of the RV you can take it on an expedition.” Ohhhh… I found nothin’! This is a slow goin’ game man. (My Shrek reference made it worth it) This is gonna take a while. Can I double-up the workload? God, it takes forever to make beds and everything. Ok your tiredness is almost full and you need water as well so drink the water. “You can move most of the objects around your shelter by going to the workbench and selecting Rearrange.” Ok, cool. So, what I want to do is put another bed down here. *thunk* Yes, I get it, go away! NO! Drink water. NoNoNoNoNo! I don’t want you to do that! Uh Bobby? Bobby’s not good on tiredness, but he needs to… craft an item- he can’t do that yet. Um, ok. Billy! Billy, you can sleep. Suzy, you’re ok, but you need sleep as well soon. Betty is going to, uh, fuckin’ pass out and die if we’re not careful. And I need a toilet as well! Ok, uh… Bobby, you need to craft a new room. I CAN’T?!?!?! I need cement… Can I craft cement? No, I need sand. *frustrated laugh* oh god This is not goin’ that good, so far. Um, ok, shit. So wha- wait, can you craft a… No, not Billy! Billy’s sleepin’! Suzy! Can you craft a… toilet? Are there any toilets here? Where are the toilets? “Poor- Poor stov-” OHhh! I can get some fuckin’ food goin’ on! A “Makeshift Toilet-” That looks like a shower! Ok, thi- This has to go down here once Betty’s done. C’mon- or can I put it up here, somewhere? Put it right here? Oh, right, there’s a curtain on it. Ok. You’re gonna build that. That’s just a fuckin’ bucket with a curtain in front of it! *laughs* *country accent* Y’all are gonna be shittin’ in the toilet together. Ummm, Brenda, can I make you craft stuff? Oh I can! Oh-Kay, I- I- I am not doing too well. Why can’t I make a new bed? *error noises* I have all- Oh I don’t have enough nails! Ok, now I’m startin’ t- to learn… the stuff that’s needed. Umm… Billy, you can get outta bed, stop fuckin’ sleepin’. Who- Who needs sleep next, the most? Betty. Betty, you need sleep… by a lot. Okay, umm, I’m probably gonna leave this episode here, for now. Ah, Brenda? Brenda, you don’t need to use the shitter as much as my other fuckin’ family members!

(my favorite line in the episode, that was fun to type) No! Brenda, STOP! What is she doin’? Ok, we’ll leav- we’ll leave her to her own devices and then I’ll go in and make everybody else take a shit, But I’m gonna leave this episode here. This game is cool, but it seems like it’s- It seems like it gets INCREDIBLY DEEP. Like incredibly deep, very very fast. And if I don’t learn what I’m doing very quickly, I’m gonna have egg on my face. And I’m gonna lose all my family members, VERY fuckin’ fast, but I might- This might be one of those games where I kinda hafta look up BEFORE I upload the episode, because this is all part of like Pax-prep videos, So, it’s gonna be a while before this episode is uploaded to get feedback on it, or to get tips or anything, so… I can’t do that, ’cause I- I’m gonna be recording the next episode before it goes up, so I might have to look up some tips on how to play, just so I can get ahead, because, as it is right now, I’m gonna run outta items and everything super fast, but really interesting game, I like this, I like it MORE than “This War of Mine” already. Because there’s a lot more customization to it, there’s a lot more… Like I can just BUILD extra rooms. I like that. It- It’s very cool, BUT ANYWAY! THANK YOU GUYS so much for watching this episode. If you LIKED it, PUNCH that Like Button, IN THE FACE LIKE A BOSS! and high fives all around *W’PSH! W’PSH* But THANK YOU GUYS and I will see all you dudes… IN THE NEXT VIDEO!!! *”I’m Everywhere” by Teknoaxe plays*
“A covenant-” *deeper voice* “A covenant of nuns has started meowing like cats. It’s spreading to the village. Uhh, why would I care? *chuckles* Uh, “GENERAL!” Send ’em out! Destroy the women who, fuckin’, meow! *music ends*
Brenda are ye done takin’ a shit? “Keeping it clean: What’s that smell?” Ya ssmelly bastards!

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